I would NOT break up with M if his arm turned into an eagle and always tried to fly away.
I would NOT break up with M if he cut off his finger tips (not fingers).
I would NOT break up with M if he cut off his finger tips and then healed them so that the finger tips of both hands were fused together, BUT I would ask him to see a shrink.
I WOULD break up with M if he talked like a car mechanic from NJ and always asked if I was doing what I was doing as I did it (i.e. "Are you reading the newspaper?" as I read the newspaper, "You brushing your teeth?" as I brush my teeth, etc).
I WOULD break up with M if I he needed me to call him Britney Spears in bed.
M would NOT break up with me if I wanted to wear a prosthetic third arm.
M would NOT break up with me if I was constantly thinking about shaved ice (on the condition that I would still talk about other things).
M would NOT break up with me if I ate canned meat out of the tin every day...but he would be far less attracted to me.
M WOULD break up with me if I was continuously flaring my nose, batting my eyes, and looking at him longingly (too disconcerting?).
You should check out Sarah Heller's poems on RealPoetik. I used to work with her when I was the managing editor of Nightboat Books: http://realpoetik.blogspot.com/.
Heller is one of the nicest people.
Real curly hair.
This reading is going on tonight. I'm still feeling a bit sick so I'm going to go home and rest, BUT, if you are out:
Monday, July 7th
The Roof of Ansche Chesed
251 West 100th Street
betw. West End Avenue & Broadway
Joshua Cohen and Anne Landsman are reading. Josh will be reading from A Heaven of Others:
"[...] one of the most provocative American novels in recent memory[...]"--The Buffalo News
"[...] a spectral, largely soundless, beautifully distorted journey through the Muslim heaven of mirages and monsters, full of dreamlike misunderstanding and illogic [...] wonderfully psychedelic prose supernovas [...] call it High Jewish Gonzo [...]"--Brooklyn Rail
"Boldly ...audaciously... A Heaven of Others is a contemplation of life's trivialities in the face of the unknown of death, and also an affirmation of the importance of those trivialities in making us who we are as individuals—something that doesn't last for very long, and should therefore be cherished."--PopMatters
Things I have accomplished in the last few days:
1) Started reading Night Wraps the Sky: Writing by and about Mayakovsky:
To be honest, I had not read much by nor previously knew much about Mayakovsky. However, just reading the first few stories about him in this odd collection makes me want to read a serious biography.
2) Watched season 2 of The Wire.
3) Finally called the IRS and found out I owe $3.99. I thought I owed hundreds, but apparently, only 4 bucks. That is a relief.
4) Made it through the D words in my GRE flashcards.
5) Ate a bucket of hummus (did you know hummus now comes in bucket size?).
6) Walked on the beach.
7) Met my (dead) grandfather's mother's sister's living daughter and celebrated her 91st birthday.
8) Started season 3 of The Wire.
9) I watched "The Big Sleep" (1946), starring Humphrey Bogart and Lauren Bacall. Did you know the screenplay was written by Faulkner?
The dialogue is so much quicker, snappier, and funnier than what we're used to these days.
10) Ok, you caught me, I was sort of sick and didn't do all that much.