Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Wheel of Poets Press

Ok, I had this genius idea the other day, which unraveled like this:

1) My egg sandwich is delicious!
2) I wish that I could eat & read at the same time :(
3) It's too bad only Wheel of Fortune is on at 7:30pm :( I don't like eating egg sandwiches while watching this show.
4) This is the dumbest show: if you paid attention in 1st-3rd grade, isn't it hard NOT to win loads of money?
5) Poets are usually broke, right?
6) WHY DON'T WE GET ALL THE POETS WE KNOW TO APPLY TO BE ON WHEEL OF FORTUNE????

Genius or what?

So, I did a little follow up investigation to see if this was feasible. It is:
http://www.wheeloffortune.com/contestantsandtickets/beacontestant/adult/

Um, it's really easy to apply (you just cannot have any relatives who work for the show or Jeopardy). AND, the questions they ask you go like (I'm really not joking, I'm cutting and pasting the questions from the link above):

Do you have a pet?
What type of pet do you have?

Are you an NFL fan?
If so, what is your favorite NFL team?

Are you an country music fan?
If so, who is your favorite country music artist?

What is your favorite Soap Opera?
Who is your favorite Soap Opera actor or actress?

This is how they decide who goes on the show? Why aren't we all applying right now?


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Some thing's abrewin' at the Bowery (yes, you know where it is). I'm pasting the info below. You should go to at least one of the readings if you can:

Our own bent on Valentine's Day:
Thursday Feb 14th:
10:00pm - 11:55pm
Ye Fourth Annual Wife of Bath Valentine's Festival of Erotic Poetry - $7. A Valentine's night guaranteed to loosen your tights featuring Seren Divine as Empress of Gorgeous, David Huberman as Regent Righteous Rod, Tsaurah Litzky as Sultreena - Queen of the Strumpets, Big Mike as Bishop Mighty Cutlass, Diane O'Debra as Maiden Merrymouth, Thad Rutkowski as Baron Thundertwig, Iris Schwartz as High Dutchess of Cleavage, Valery Oisteneau as Vicar of Voluptuous Vice, Shappy as Sire Sweetkiss! + Infamous Oddest
Bodice Contest! and TripleXXX Medieval Burlesque! $7 http://tsaurahlitzky.com/

Saturday Feb 16th:
8:00pm - 9:30pm
NYSCA and Bowery Arts and Science National Treasures Presents: JOHN GIORNO, JAVIER COLIS, JULIAN BLANE - $10, students FREE

Sunday Feb 17th:
6:00pm - 8:30pm
Urban Word/Bowery Arts & Science Benefit: HOLLYWOOD DOES POETRY w/John Ashbery Eric Bogosian, Patricia Clarkson, Sarah Vowel and others...

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Sunday night Zinc is also rocking out with Matthew (Zappy) Zapruder and Noel Kocot:

Noelle Kocot and Matthew Zapruder
The Zinc Bar, 90 W. Houston (at LaGuardia Place)
Sunday February 17th, 7pm

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7 comments:

Logan Ryan Smith said...

I'm actually really terrible at Wheel O Fortune. I'd probably have to give them some of my own money before leaving the game.

That's how bad I am.

Julia Cohen said...

You can be the decoy so that Wheel of Fortune doesn't get suspicious when so many poets start winning millions. So bad is good, LRS. You'll get a cut.

Tinaeatyourham said...

Is that a WoF computer game?? CGI Pat Sajak?

Ana Božičević-Bowling said...

We could also go on Deal or No Deal. You don't even have to know anything to get on that show.

Julia Cohen said...

Deal or No Deal...Howie Mendel scares the shit out of me.

Mark said...

I took the test to be on Jeopardy, but nothing ever came of it.

Andrea Baker said...

Hey- I lost your email address (computer died) and poems died with the computer. I know you have google mail so you're the one I'm hitting up to send me every poem I ever sent to you b/c I think it will be slightly less of a pain for you. Sorry and thank you.